The Monday Roast: Southwest Airlines Flight Attendant Songs

1.  I'm about to miss my connection and you're singing some variation on Zip-Ah-Dee-Doo-Dah?!

2.  The people that stayed on the plane during the connection know you're singing the same song twice.

3.  Singing to a group of people that are locked in a chamber to which you hold the key--and who are miserable, stressed, cramped, smelly and tired--seems more like torture than entertainment.

4.  If there were no flight attendants Southwest prices would still get people on the plane; if there were no songs more people might get back on the plane.

5.  If you're going to force me to stay seated and listen to a song, couldn't you give me an entire can of soda?!

Boom, roasted.