Thursday, October 14, 2010

AB Gettin' Older

On the 26th anniversary of the birth of AB, here are 26 things you might want to know about him:

1.  In fifth grade, AB weighed the same as he does now (roughly).

2.  AB's father did not weigh 100 pounds until he was in college.

3.  The first time AB was inebriated he turned to BH and said, "[BH], I am intoxicated."

4.  AB was an accomplice to a severe assault on AB's younger brother's nipples.

5.  AB was once a Falcon stripper.

6.  AB spent an entire fall driving to Phoenix on Sundays before the sun came up.

7.  AB almost struck and killed a Cayolina.

8.  AB heard someone say, "I don't know where my pants are," and it didn't involve a sexual encounter.

9.  AB was inebriated before Hood to Coast.

10.  AB crushed Hood to Coast.

12.  In the company of the same man--on the same day--AB worked out; got smoothies; went to the Humane Society; made salsa, fish tacos and sangria; cleaned the pool shirtless; took a nap on the couch; and is happily straight.

13.  AB once called out his high school teammates on a high school baseball message board.

14.  AB spends every new years with a man who makes a living selling bugs.

15.  AB is desperately searching for a platonic male relationship in San Francisco.

16.  Shaun White once offered to pee on AB.

17.  AB knows "a Carroll."

18.  AB is a ferociously enthusiastic Karaoke singer.

19.  AB ran home in his boxers one time.

20.  AB played tennis for a year in high school because he was scared of the baseball coach.

21.  AB once arose at 3:15 in the morning, got fully dressed, put on sunscreen and then discovered the clock was wrong.

22.  AB deals in umbilical cords.

23.  AB owned a stick shift car before he knew how to drive stick.

24.  AB always has girl problems even when he doesn't.

25.  AB is a 6'4" blond hair, blue eyed Jewish male.

26.  AB is a cool dude.

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