Laughable Pride in the Desert: ASU and Marketing and Full Bladders

On Saturday I was fighting a nice hangover.  That morning I would also make a less-than-shocking realization.  To combat said hangover, I had consumed a multi-vitamin and a medium coffee.  Black.  Overall it was shaping up to be a nice morning: laundry, homemade egg sandwich, that coffee, lazy wake up, some good college hoop.  Indeed, Saturday morning was glorious.

And, per most mornings, I had to urinate at some point.

Now, let’s briefly recap: hangover, multi-vitamin, coffee.  Such a consumption combination and subsequent urination is what led to my less-than-shocking realization.

What I realized Saturday morning as I urinated was how little Arizona State has to be excited about.  It’s a miserable athletic program with little going for it.  They are the worst basketball team in the Pac-10 and they had to apply for bowl status (denied).  They’re ranked below NAU in the Director’s Cup rankings and their primary color is the same as my hungover/multi-vitamin/coffee piss.

This is their current marketing slogan: You Are Proud.  You Are Bold.  You Are ASU.  You Are Our Home Court Advantage.  So, ASU fans are not proud or bold?  They don’t constitute the fan base?  What sort of advantage might they provide?  The athletic department, so averagely run by Lisa Love, is literally reminding their fans to be fans; how to feel and what to be.

Their position of mediocrity neither angers nor saddens me.  It feels about right.  The chants of “U of A” echoing through the emptying Wells Fargo Arena felt about right, too.   Ultimately, Arizona State’s athletic deficiencies are irrelevant to the things I care about, like conference and national championships; so Bear Down.

Allow me to spell out the beginning of what I started here: ASU gold looks like piss.  And piss is bodily waste.  Let’s take that logic and add one more line to ASU’s marketing slogan:

YOU ARE PISS POOR.

Homer's Preview the Pac-10 (for the last time ever)

Fear not, it's not the last time we'll ever talk about sports on the West Coast. Quite the contrary. This season marks the end of the Pacific 10 Conference as a pack of 10. 

The question heading into this season for the Pac-10 is whether the conference as a whole can get any worse.  Conventional wisdom suggests there is nowhere else to go from last season but up.  We'll see, but one thing is for sure, even though Oregon State is atop the conference today, they won't be at season's end.

Arizona:

So what's going on in Tucson?  Derrick Williams is no longer a secret; he was freshman player-of-the-year and is projected as a high first round draft pick.  Even with teams focusing all their defensive schemes on Williams, he is still a lock to lead the team in points and rebounds.  After that is anyone's guess--though not for lack of options.  Sean Miller runs 10 or more players out on the court every game with nearly every player not named Derrick splitting minutes at their respective positions.  However, no one besides Derrick seems poised to step up consistently.  There have been flashes of good play from Solomon Hill, Kevin Parrom, and even MoMo Jones, but each of those players enjoy disappearing acts just as frequently.  The team also lacks consistency at the point which has provided for some serious shooting woes at times--especially against 2-3 zones.  That being said, the team is far more consistent this year than last, especially on defense.  As a result Arizona wins most of the games it should and may find a top three finish in the Pac-10 and a return to the NCAA Tournament.  Until then, the recipe for success is: don't play Jimmer Fredette, and don't play against a 2-3 zone.

arizona state:

Have you ever been somewhere and thought: "that just doesn't belong there."  You know, like a golf course in the middle of the desert; a baby in a bar; or Sean Hannity at at an Obama rally.  The same holds true for basketball at ASU.  You see it and think, "that just doesn't make sense."  ASU basketball is, and always will be, mired in mediocrity.  A glass ceiling will hang perpetually over the success of that program.  Sure they have the reigning coach of the year in Herb Sendek, but the Pac-10 was so bad last year he won by default.  Besides, anyone that can coax 10+ wins out of an ASU basketball team deserves some recognition.  We'll see what the ol' Herbivore can cook up this year without his boy toy Derek Glasser.  So far the Scummies have managed to lose every game that posed a marginal challenge.  In short, don't look for this year to be the year the JV team in Arizona manages to make a Sweet 16 (or the tournament).

California:

While we need to examine Romar’s ability to coach vs. recruit, the opposite can be said for Mr. Montgomery.  This guy is a helluva coach.  No one has ever questioned that.  He won at Stanford and he won a lot.  He was winning with inferior recruiting abilities, limited by academic standards (the reason Jim Harbough should have been national coach of the football year).  But there’s just no talent on this Cal team.  When your starting point guard is Jorge Gutierrez your team is going to struggle.  The dude is a great glue guy, solid energy off the bench, and a thorn in any opponent’s side.  He’s  just not a starting guard.  Harper Kamp is a nice player but that’s about where it stops.  I loved last year’s team.  But this team has been gutted.  Monty is going to need some help beyond being Monty.  He needs some talent and that’s going to be his problem to solve. 

Oregon:

Dana Altman huddled his players up and said, "Listen, we're getting a new arena this year, so you've got one shining moment guaranteed this season."  That moment will surely shine--Uncle Phil would not have it any other way.  However, Uncle Phil can't do anything about the talent on the floor (directly)--which is lacking.  In his first season Altman will weather the storm of transfers and lack of recruits.  Fifth year senior Joevan Catron is averaging upwards of 17 points a game this season, but it gets ugly after that.  Maybe Oregon finds lightning in a bottle and surprises someone once or twice this season.  Other than that, the story in Eugene is a new basketball arena and the football team that plays down the street.  Also, lets take a moment of silence to remember the late, great, McArthur Court.

Oregon State:

Okay, so Craig Robinson is President Obama's brother in law.  President Obama even came to watch the Beavers lose to George Washington in DC.  However, Craig has had as much early season success as his brother in law did in the midterm elections.  Craig guided his Beavers to losses against Seattle, Texas Southern, Utah Valley, and Montana.  After a promising start to his tenure in Corvallis, Craig Robinson's teams have shown very little improvement, and Oregon State's resume of losses this season tend to indicate disappointment with Mr. Robinson.  He will need to turn things around during Pac-10 play otherwise his seat will become increasingly hot.  That said, no one enjoys a trip to Gill Collesium in Corvallis and that will not change anytime soon.

UCLA:

On paper, this is a good team.  In reality, it’s just good television.  Let’s talk dysfunctional.  Evidently Ben Howland has alienated all sorts of recruiting ties and hasn’t developed a talent since Darren Collison (but even he plateaued).  Tyler Honeycutt is as good as any player in the Pac but Howland can’t get anything out of him.  He went off against Kansas but why wouldn’t he?  Oh sweet external motivators.  At a certain point you need to take a look and realize the power is in the player’s court, Howland needs to get out of his own way and figure out how to win again.  The talent is there – Josh Smith, Reeves Nelson, Malcolm Lee – but grind-it-out ball doesn’t work with elite talent anymore.  Because of that talent, the Bruins are going to win some ball games, but I ask the question: is there a clock ticking on Big Ben?

USC:

He was chastised at Arizona and became the fall guy.   But the fact of the matter is that Kevin O’Neil can draw the toughness out of players.  For goodness sake he has a Euro, Nikola Vucevic, grabbing rebounds at a 9.6 per game clip.  The sanctioned heavy Trojans tout an aggressive frontline which can cause some fits for the smaller, softer Pac.  Alex Stephensen is heavy and the aforementioned Vucevic are going to win the Trojans some games.  Conversely, it’s still O’Neil ball and they’re going to no-offense themselves out of some games and lose when they shouldn’t (TCU, Bradley, Rider).  I believe the Trojan x-factor (not ribbing or flavoring) is Jio Fontan.  The touted freshman transfer will give the Trojans a backcourt scoring option, keeping teams honest and not collapsing into the paint.  Look, big things aren’t going to come out of Watts this season, but they could just leave you stunned on a couple of Thursdays or Saturdays.

Stanford:

Can a Stanford team be any good if not stocked with a pair of seven foot tall twins?  For the better part of a decade no one had to answer that question.  Alas, this Johnny Dawkins Stanford team doesn't have one seven footer on the roster, and early indications are that no one on the roster has a brother who is seven feet tall either.  However, in true to Stanford tradition, this team does have a shooter; Jeremy Green is shooting better than 46% from behind the arc.  After that, the roster is chalk full of freshman who have yet to establish themselves.  Stanford might have some success fending off a couple teams to stay out of the cellar, but don't count on much more.  This team is still a few more years away, and there is no guarantee they won't still be a few more years away in a few more years.

Washington:

I like this program.  Romar appears to be a classy guy and runs a good show.  But at what point do we call a recruiter a recruiter and a coach a coach?  He’s planted in a hot bed of hoops – it’s still a tragedy Seattle was raped of its NBA franchise – and UW consistently scoops up this talent subsequently garnering early paper-praise.  But then why don’t these teams produce?  Why are they just above competitive each year?  As for this dance, the Dawgs had pre-season rankings as high as 8^th in the country.  This has since evaporated and the Huskies find themselves heading into Pac-10 play unranked.  To be fair, they’ve lost to some good teams (Kentucky, MSU), but they still don’t seem to win the tough one.  It is encouraging to see the emergence of Matthew Bryan-Ammaning and the scoring of Justin Holiday more than double, but the team that is supposed to run away with the Pac-10 may be indicative of just how far this league has fallen.

Washington State:

Sleeper alert.  The Cougars and their Ichabod Crane looking coach, Ken Bone, have a sneaky good squad.  Reggie Moore and Klay Thomson highlight things but that’s just the surface.  Look a little further down the lineup and you’ll see a more-than-formidable big man in  DeAngelo Casto and the early front runner for Pac-10 Newcomer-of-the-Year, Faisal Aden.   Aden, a JC transfer, is scoring a cool 17 per and has helped lead the Cougs to their solid start despite missing Moore for five games.  This is a balanced attack as they can score from all three guard spots and via Casto underneath.  Thompson makes for matchup issues as his ability to shoot is the equalizer of equalizers.  I still think he’s a bit soft but the addition of Aden changes things.  Ultimately, I see the Pullman gang competing down the stretch for the Pac-10 title.  Yes, the league’s title.   

A Major Cluster-Duck

University of Oregon: Get. It. Together.

On this very site, BH and I have written extensively of your successes and sang your praises. Chip Kelly did a fantastic job following the season opening disaster last year. Finally, as tardy as it was, you let Ernie Kent go. You created a baseball program. You had a top-five football team heading into next season. Oregon, you’ve been doing well...

...and then Spring 2010 arrived. FYL (that’s short for F your life):

• The series of football arrests and subsequent suspension/dismissal of Jermiah Masoli
• The leaking of the Ernie Kent firing
• The departure/firing/buyout/whatever of Mike Belotti after one year
• The coaching search

These poorly orchestrated events are not good. It doesn’t look good, it doesn’t smell good, it doesn’t taste good. In fact, it’s bad.

The arrests, while they reflect poorly, are what they are. Sometimes kids make very unfortunate decisions, but I sincerely do not believe it is due to a lack of institutional control on Kelly’s part. He created a Rose Bowl birth after the meltdown that was Boise State last September and the dude can flat out coach. By no means am I condoning the behavior of his football team, they screwed up; but this seems to happen in lots of places and is not exclusive to Oregon. As hard as it was, Kelly is instituting discipline and the offenders are paying the consequences. It looks bad, but next issue.

Leaking the Ernie Kent firing was not that big of a deal, but it was certainly not classy; especially because the eventual firing was glaringly obvious, and Kent had been a loyal Duck. Kent served as head basketball coach of his alma mater for 13 years--he deserved better than what he got. I’ve never been a huge Kent fan but I do believe he got shown the door in a less than professional manner and Belotti – or someone in his office – dropped the ball on that one.

Speaking of Belotti: what the hell happened there? My conclusion on that awkward separation is that he clearly was a figurehead, a puppet, for the long, strong arm of Phil.  Phil Knight that is.  Phil Knight of Nike that is. I know the University of Nike thing gets a bit played out, but seriously, Phil’s hand is in that Athletic Department and when Athletic Director’s are leaving with subsequent Attorney General investigations, something’s not quite right. Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.

So without an AD, what now of the vacant – STILL vacant – Men’s Basketball coaching position? We could also look at the question like this: who will uber-boosters Pat Kilkenny and Knight find or pay? Right now, no one. And it’s getting ugly. Numerous deadlines have come and gone and there’s seemingly been very little interest in the position. Are we looking at a Steinbrenner-esque situation imposed by Knight/Kilkenny where no one wants to be micromanaged by the hand of God? Is the Head Basketball Coach at the University of Oregon a toxic seat?

And then there’s the factor that this is a huge hire that Oregon should not screw up. The changing face of college hoops says that you can win anywhere. Just ask Brad Stevens. Yeah, yeah, the dude just got paid, but he fell in love with Butler first and, more importantly, won there. While Butler is in basketball crazy Indiana, it sure ain’t Chapel Hill or Westwood. But you know what? Butler won. UNC and UCLA didn’t.

That’s not to say that these schools will never win again; by all accounts they’ll be very good, very soon. The point I’m trying to make is that you can win anywhere and with any resources. Coaching matters. Lord Phil’s money will never make Tajuan Porter a better decision maker (he was awful) or anyone play better team defense. The longer the school waits to make this hire the more it’s going to end up settling and letting down a fan base ready to usher in a new era in a new arena that makes the Taj Mahal look like a cheap condo.

To settle would not be okay and would embarrass a University already dragging itself through an inferno of embarrassment. The right coach will do a good job and can certainly put together a perennial competitor in Eugene. It’s a good job.

On the heels of the worst Pac-10 basketball season ever, West Coast basketball can’t afford to have one if its major Universities screw this up either. The Pac-10 has not had a team in the Top 25 since December and the only positive headline it's had since November was Washington's run to the Sweet 16--as an 11 seed.

The Oregon coaching search is doing nothing to smooth the currently rocky face of West Coast hoops.

If Oregon indeed wants to compete with the likes of UCLA, Arizona, Gonzaga, or even Saint Mary’s – and it can – they need to get this right. The longer they wait, the wronger they get. The silver lining is that a troubled athletic department can come out of this smelling like roses if it makes a good hire.

It’s been 4+ weeks since the inevitable Kent firing and there’s still no one there to usher in recruits for 2010-11. The only thing keeping this “search” from becoming the laughing stock of college basketball is that no one cares about basketball on the West Coast right now; deservedly so.

Hence, Oregon needs to get the right man in there and get him soon. The Western basketball community is depending on it.

Why W.C. Homer

We are sports fans, outdoors enthusiasts, liberal supporters, competition junkies, ASU haters, and proponents of the left side of the country (pun intended).

A Homer is a supporter of his roots. We have roots in the West Coast. We support it. We are West Coast Homers.

We love Arizona Basketball, 10pm E.T. kickoffs, afternoon Super Bowls, shorts in November and sandals year round. We love the National League and playoffs at the lunch hour. We take our sunsets over the ocean, our highways without out tolls, and our horizons without ends. We play in National Parks, ski in the spring, and surf in the winter. We love Highway 1, Hood-to-Coast, high peaks, and hacky-sack. We love San Diego, San Francisco, and Seattle. We love the Rockies, the Rose Bowl, road trips, and Rodeo Break. We love the PAC-10, west coast offenses, NCAA Softball, and Mexican food at 2am. We watch College Game Day before the sun rises, we didn't play lacrosse, and our long boards have wheels. The southwest is our home, our street names are in Spanish, and we're W.C. Homers born and bred.

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